Under The Apricot Tree

This post is going to be a little awkward because it involves some very personal details about my current physical and health. I want to begin incorporating stories from my real life in my blog, not just poetry reflecting it. I used to have very regular periods. I always started within one to two days of my app's prediction date. Day 2 of bleeding was always my most painful day, but it was manageable with ibuprofen. Then two years ago when I was sitting in my Sophomore math class, I felt this really dull ache in my lower abdomen. I knew I was supposed to be starting my period so I was already prepared and wearing a pad. As the class continued, I started to feel nauseous. When the class ended and I was walking to English the pain in my abdomen got much worse. I also began to feel really dizzy. I walked as quickly as I could to my next class, which was English. When I got to the class, things went bad very quickly. The color drained from my skin, I looked paler than I had ever be

I’m not really sure where I am now But I know my life’s play has taken its final bow I’d like to think I danced through life But it was not without strife I’m not really sure how I got here But I remember my mother’s eye dropped a tear As she filled the tub with my bath water “I love you my sweet daughter” I cried that there weren’t bubbles in the tub She shushed me and began to scrub She tucked my curls behind my ear And told me soon our pain will disappear I looked at the purple marks on her arm She told me there was no need for alarm One last kiss before she laid me down It was in that moment she let me drown