Under The Apricot Tree

The Smell of His Home The smell of the house was old Not like the smell of mold But of dust, newspaper, and Snapple Tea Warm Chili and Soup, homemade In my mind, the smell will never fade Lizard Wart You had this big knobby mole You said you got it meeting your goal The lizard was so quick And when you caught it, it did not lick The bite left behind a big bump You called it a wart but it was just a lump His Room I cannot go in that room Without feeling the deepest gloom So many memories burn in my head Of my sweet uncle who is now dead No one understands why I cannot go in that room But my heart feels an oncoming doom Powerless I felt so powerless I could no longer dream of happiness His life was coming to an end Was there nothing I could mend? I watched his body waste away That truly was the worst day Lonely When I feel lonely with no one to hear my grumble I find myself talking to my deceased uncle He left

My AP Literature class had to take about 50 lines from Hamlet and translate it into a modern style text. My group decided to make it vulgar with a mix of 1980's slang, current popular slang, and references to the television shows "Jimmy Neutron" and "Spongebob Squarepants". We then performed it infront of the entire class. Let's just say the reactions were great. This is Act III, Scene i lines 43-90 of Shakespeare's Hamlet  Polonius: Ophelia woman, m’ere. [to the king] Homeboy, we’ll hide [To OPHELIA] read this bible because it will look like you are pious and sweet bow-head but psych!! We are totally spying on those yuppies. Of course it's not like we are doing anything too wild. Lots of people hide their true intentions behind religion. Don’t look like you are shitting bricks. King: (aside) Truuu! Well damn, that bums me out. You know them bimbo hoes be covering up their grody faces with makeup and shit, that’s exactly what I am d